I Rhyme When I'm Angry....

You

My head is swirling quickly

I don't know what to say.

You've hurt me many times before

but never as bad as today.

So here's my resignation

From my efforts to try and get along.

I'm finally standing up for myself

No more apologies,

You're the one in the wrong.

You are toxic and conniving

Back stabber extraordinaire.

You've also taught your daughter

You two make quite a pair.

I almost let you get into my head

For a second I doubted my heart.

I thought I was a good person?

Or maybe I'm not very smart?

Thankfully I quickly remembered

How people like you work.

You always play the weak helpless victim

and try and make others feel like a jerk.

Not today Sweetheart.

This chic has had enough.

No more little miss nice girl,

time to get a little rough.

You see,

Most times I ask God for forgiveness

and now I ask for restraint.

I kept praying I'd find good in you

but there isn't...

there just ain't.

You have completely taken for granted,

the many nice things I do for you.

Maybe you will take notice now

Cuz I'm done going out of my way to do..

ANYTHING for you.

And as the years go by.

I will go on being me.

And I don't care if you don't like it

I will spare you my company :)

Valium

This is a blog I wrote the other night before my dental appointment and ( for obvious reasons) I fell asleep before finishing or posting it.  I thought I'd be a good sport and share it ha ha!

Have you ever taken Valium? Me either,until now, Have you ever tried blogging on Valium? Me either,until now. I was given a prescription of it to take before my dental appointment tomorrow so I decided to take one this evening to be sure of any possible side effects. So,for the fun of reading this later,I thought I'd blog about it.

Everything feels a bit dreamy and in slow motion and I am super duper relaxed. I still don't love the idea of going to the dentist but my worry and anxiety about it has all but disappeared! Awesome.

Today I challenged my friends on facebook to a  December Challenge-
"Do one good,kind,random,generous,loving,supportive and or selfless thing each day this month. Big or small,it's all contagious! Hold the door for someone,drop off a few cans at your local food bank,hug someone and brighten their day,it doesn't have to cost a thing and takes 2 seconds ;)  I'd love to see my friends join me and share happy stories of giving and the joy it brings!"
Day 1- I prepaid for a coffee for the next random customer at my coffee stand. The best part was the surprised look on the barista's face as she said "Wow that's cool,Merry Christmas!!"

So far a few friends have anxiously joined the challenge and I hope it continues to be contagious!
Honestly,the reason I did this is because so many of my friends seem focused too much on material things or petty selfish issues.

Annnnd....then I fell asleep,a deep,happy sleep. My dental appointment the next day went great (the tooth came right out!) and so far I am healing up nicely! So glad it is all over,I really hope next year is a healthier year for us!
Day 2 and 3-Vern and I put up the tree while listening to Christmas music and then we headed downtown to the parade.It was freezing but lots of fun and I got to snuggle with my mini BFF Maddy! My good deeds for the past few days were- making a few gluten free freezer meals for my MIL, surprising Trevor's Mom with Starbucks and holding up traffic on the highway for a pedestrian. The Christmas Spirit has finally found me!

Tails Of A Doggy Mother

My theory was that raising dogs would be easier and cheaper than having kids...but at times I am not too sure!? So here's a solute to all you doggy Moms...

Potty training-we've been working on it for almost a year and we still have the occasional accident. The area rug in my living room is ruined. Thankfully with our schedules we are able to take them out every 3-5 hours at night. Yes we still wake up with our kids all.night.long yet they are 1 and 5 years old. On weekends we can sleep through the night but if we sleep in...well,you know. On road trips,there are many times we have pulled over to find a potty for our little passengers when it appears the urge has arrived at the most inopportune time.

Illness-Just this evening I found myself practically dropping my laptop as I jumped up...Chipper had puked and my doggy Mommy instinct knew I better clean it up quick...before he ate it! Ew.Last month Maxine got stung by a bee. She had a horrible reaction and almost had to go to the Vet! Note to self-Maxine is allergic to bees.

Discipline-Chipper,a typical oldest child is smart,obedient and responsible. I was much younger when I adopted him and I followed a strict obedience regime. He was not allowed on the bed,or to bark, or run out the door before me or anything else the experts said to do. He was kennel trained and spent his days in there while I worked. And then came along Maxine 5 years later. I have become a more relaxed Mother. Now both of them sleep on the bed,Maxi on my head and Chipper at my feet.She barks as she barrels out the back door if she suspects there is even the smallest "security threat". I read a new puppy manual..but I have yet to apply any of the advice. She thinks her kennel is a toy and only gets locked in it for a "time out" and is allowed to roam free in the house most of the day. I have become such a softy! BUT..I love my kids.

Grooming-My kids need haircuts too. Every 6-8 weeks and it costs almost 4 times more than a child's haircut at the salon. I also have to bathe my kids and use special shampoo I have to order off the Internet. It costs the same as my hair products do. I HAVE TO brush them at least every other day or they matt horribly.

Teething-In the last year Maxine has chewed through 2 cell phone chargers,2 laptop cords and the cord to my blow dryer for a grand total of $140. Just like kids,you can buy them tons of great toys but they'd rather play with things they aren't supposed to or could potentially harm them. Maxine will also eat just about anything that spikes her interest,she especially likes to eat her poop. Lovely.

But don't let all this complaining fool you,I wouldn't trade my furbabies for anything! I love them both so much, they melt my heart on a daily basis. The snuggles,the kisses and the unconditional love is more than I ever expected from a dog...I don't even like calling them "dogs",they are MY KIDS!! ha ha
So here's to you,the Moms with furbabies! It's not always easy but it's always worth it :)

November

I often ask myself what makes me stop blogging for awhile...I know that sometimes it's because my mind is full of frustrations that are best not spewed out in haste on the Internet. Sometimes it's because my brain is tired and I want to amuse myself with mindless activities on Facebook or Pinterest. Sometimes it's because my life has had many changes this year and blogging has taken a back seat to new interests and priorities. But,when it comes right down to it,I love to blog,I always come back for more.
Since my last blog Maxine turned one!  It was the fun little pink birthday party I always wanted to have for my little girl! Both kids are doing great,Chipper was a good sport on Halloween and let me put his Santa outfit on..for about ten minutes.

Trevor is still living with us. It seems that life here isn't so bad after all....? ha ha For the most part he is a huge help but there are times I am reminded he is a 19 year old male and my Mother's words replay in my head "Men grow until they are 25,be patient."
So life goes on,in this little house of ours, 3 men,2 dogs and myself. Oh myself,it hasn't exactly been my best year....

First it was my gallbladder,I have spent 6 of the last 11 months either sick or recovering from the removal of that rotten organ.THEN,I crack a tooth so bad that it has to be removed! I have suffered for 2 weeks and I still  have 5 days to go before they pull  it out. Ugh. On top of all of that, there has also been adjustments to my anxiety medication,which makes me a little off my "game" for a week or two. This becomes the times I also hate my job. I struggle to keep up with the upbeat precision my clients expect while also continuing to get kicked in the proverbial ass by a corporation that only knows me as employee #bla bla bla! Growth..it's all personal growth right?!

This morning,on my way out of the shower (where I do all my deep thinking) I came to the conclusion that I am going through the "finding myself" stage in life. You know,when you start to take a good hard look in the mirror? When you stop pretending that everything isn't always someone elses fault and own up to the things about yourself that you don't like .....and want to change. Trying to see what others love about you.... and why. I wiped my wet face and hair with a giant pink fluffy towel,looked up to the Heavens and said "Fine. Break me. I need you to help me to be the best human being I can be. " I know and trust that on the flip side of all of this,it is all part of a much larger plan,propelled by love. Love, it's what wakes me up in the morning and keeps me warm at night. Beyond me or anything I could create in my wildest dreams,I have been given true love and a partner to share my life with. I say this because no matter how upside down life gets,I always have Vern by my side to keep my feet on solid ground and I couldn't be more thankful.

Now,onto a more light hearted subject before I wrap this up for the night. The holidays. We just survived 10-13 family members in and out of our tiny house,2-3 meals a day for 4 days. Vern and I prepared a Thanksgiving feast like no other before! We had 2 kinds of smoked turkey,all the traditional potato and stuffing fixings ,ham,candied bacon,truffles,pies,dips,chips,cheese,fudge and jello salad just to name a few..it was lots of fun! Everyone had a great time and the only complaints I heard was about the sudden shrinkage of every one's pants ha ha good times...I think it's going to take me a week to catch the Christmas spirit. Vern was a good sport and spent a few hours yesterday hanging Christmas lights...that helps! I will pack up the plastic pumpkins and mini hay bale in exchange for assembling the Christmas tree and hanging the stockings......next week :)

I'm Right Here

I've struggled at times with the many changes that have taken place in my life the last few years.

Adjusting to living in a house full of men as God has used this opportunity to teach me to be a loving servant of him and ALL of his children.

I have gradually become a full time girlfriend,sister in law and step mom over the last 3 1/2 years.

Our situation is far from ordinary...

And then last Saturday I had a small epiphany.

It was a cold,grey,rainy morning.

We had a rough start and I was left grumpy and alone to finish my coffee.

Rather that sit and stew I decided to get busy and start my day.

Del came stumbling downstairs in a sleepy haze to retrieve a cup of coffee.

I was busy in the kitchen washing dishes and making salted caramel butter bars.

We chatted for a bit,

I complained about my morning,

he sympathized,we laughed and then he headed back upstairs.

A few minutes later I heard him turning on the radio..

finding a good song...

and then turning the volume way up.

I don't know what came over me but..

I danced.

Like full out booty shaking white girl, with soapy hands, in the middle of the kitchen with a stupid grin, 

danced.

Suddenly I spun around to see 2 tiny faces staring at me in confusion.

Chipper and Maxine both looking up at me like they were ready to call the crazy farm!

I laughed as I wiped my hands and asked them both to dance.

Yah...no. They were too freaked out!

That's when it happen,

as if the last 3 years suddenly made sense all over again.

"I am right where I need to be."

In this house full of men,washing dishes,baking goodies,snuggling my fur babies and making memories.

Yes it's far from ordinary

but I know that it is all part of His plan.

I feel very blessed to be finding a more positive outlook and appreciating the work He has done with me to bring me to where I am today.

Right where I need to be.

:)



The Other Day....

I was in such a flustered hurry to get ready for work,

 that I accidentally grabbed my eyeshadow instead of my blush.

 One purple stroke of my blush brush later...

Yup,

I need to quit hitting the snooze button.

October

Pinterest. That's where I have been.
 Don't make me explain just Google it and go and get signed up immediately. You will love it,I promise and in advance..you're welcome :) There is so much good stuff it has consumed all of my free time for the last week. While you are there look me up and "follow" me!
But that's not ALL I have been doing..
I attended my first tea party at my friend Sonja's.

 IT WAS AMAZING! Pure girly fun down to every last detail! Every girl should have a tea house in her back yard like this-

I am also almost done with my 2nd batch of apple butter. I scored two huge buckets of apples from my neighbor's tree.

 I found that if I peel,core and then run them through the food processor into pulp first I can fit an entire 5 gallon bucket's worth in my crock pot. One batch,even with my new method, takes about 3 days to finish It's a labor of love that's for sure! I will be canning them and storing them away for Christmas gifts. The other bonus is that my house constantly smells like apples and cinnamon,perfect for fall!

The Briscoe "fuppies" are getting close to adoption day,it will be hard to say goodbye but I know Shannon is screening the new families very carefully. I went to visit for a little photo shoot and brought some hair bows for the girls,they were good sports about it!

>wink<

And last but not least I have been doing a lot more cooking and baking. I am especially proud of these-
Chocolate cupcakes with chocolate chip cookie dough filling and chocolate frosting. YUM!